The Groom’s Speech doesn’t have to be scary

The main purpose of the Groom’s speech is to thank a variety of people.  It should be short and informal but sincere at the same time.  It does have some scope for humour but don’t go overboard.  Starting your speech with the words “On behalf of my wife and I…” WILL raise a cheer and give you a confidence boost for delivering the rest of it.

The following is the structure of the speech I gave when I got wed.  I hope you find it useful.

TIP: Before you stand up to deliver your speech, think of something that makes you laugh or smile.  In that way, your guests will see you rise with a big smile and not a look of dread.

Say thank you to…

  1. …the father of the bride – for his speech which normally precedes yours;
  2. …all your guests for coming.  It is worth mentioning specifically those that have travelled a fair distance and perhaps those who couldn’t be with you on your big day;
  3. …both sets of parents and families – include a sincere compliment;
  4. …your ushers – they have probably been busy in the background, fixing stuff so you weren’t bothered with it;
  5. …the staff at your reception venue – there is still quite a bit of the day to go after you’ve spoken so buttering them up a little won’t hurt;
  6. …any individuals you’d like to thank specifically for their contribution to the day’s events.  Don’t go overboard here or you will get tired of saying the words “Thank you!” after a while;
  7. …your bride – for agreeing to marry you.  You’ll score MAJOR browny points if you compliment her here.  In fact, it’s expected!

You should also thank your best man (perhaps with a bit of mickey taking thrown in – he’s about to have free rein on you) and the bridesmaids but hold off on these thanks until the end.  Your speech should end with a toast to the bridesmaids.

The second part of your speech should cover what marriage to your bride means to you.  Include some anecdotes from your courtship and/or how you proposed.  This is the ONLY time your mates will forgive you for being sentimental but again you can inject a little humour.

And, as I said above, end with the toast, “To the Bridesmaids!!”

I found the following web links particularly useful when preparing my speech…

After all the above, the rest is down to you.  Remember to practice, practice, practise!!  Deliver your speech to a blank wall or an empty room.  Do this out loud.  What reads well on paper or sounds good in your head may not sound so good when you actually say it.  It may not flow as well as you thought.

Finally, on the day, relax and enjoy one or two drinks with your guests.  One or two should be enough!

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It’s “…next month…” – Time’s Marching On!

I’ve had a mini wake-up call. I’d been counting down to the wedding in months and more recently, weeks now that it’s in single figures. This week, someone used the phrase “…next month…”. Whilst accurate, that’s a big realisation! And I’m guessing there will be a similar wobbly moment when it becomes “…next week…”

The selection of songs for the first dance is not quite in single figures yet but it’s close. We’ve both got a favourite. Importantly, it’s the same one but there are others still in the running.

The wedding list goes live next week. We’ve had a bit of grief with their wesite doing (not so) funny things to the selections we’ve made. So if you see some “interesting” pieces on there, go for the safe option – vouchers!

The next month or so will be spent getting confirmations from suppliers, setting out the detail for each of them.

I’ve almost finished writing my speech. Next is to learn it almost parrot fashion so I only need prompt cards. There’s a little bit of everything in there so it should go down well with everyone I think.

We’re getting there!

There’ll be Music and Flowers

Finally!!!  The music for both the ceremony and the reception is decided.

A friend of ours is a music teacher but she also plays in a string quartet and so we’ve asked them to play at the ceremony.  We’ve listened to those wedding music CDs I mentioned before.  For me, it’s not so much about demanding certain pieces; more about the pieces I don’t want.  I’ve told Vicky that she’d better not be too late, leaving me to listen to some obscure playlist.

For the evening reception, we’ve booked The Bedroom Orchestra (aka Tristan Mackay).  He’s a regular busker in Leeds city centre and there are loads of clips of him doing just that on YouTube.  I will admit to being a little dubious about whether, as a one man band, he could create the party atmosphere we want at the reception but after speaking to him on the phone, that fear quickly went away.  We decided against Three Men and a Bass in the end.  There were just too many instances of them not getting back in touch for long periods of time; they didn’t seem to want or care about the booking enough.  If it was going to be this hard getting in touch with them this long before the wedding, how hard was it going to be in the weeks and days in the run up to the big event?

We recently got a text message from our florist; she’s had her baby and all’s well.  We also got her quote along with the ideas she has for the various floral arrangements.  They look really good!  Having said that, there’s a discussion going on about what kind of button-hole I’m going to wear.  I’m told that traditionally, it should be a heather but I’m struggling to find out if that’s true.  Anyone got any reference points for me?

The best man now knows he’s wearing a kilt and is not nearly put out enough for my liking.  He’s still promising a speech to top all wedding speeches.  Apparently, his wife is vetting them and has ruled out three versions to-date.